The oncologist warned us that Jane wold be feeling the side effects of the radiotherapy for probably another 5 months. He said she would notice things such as tiredness, memory loss and somnolence. We nodded and pretended to understand. We thought somnolence was just related to sleeping. Well, it kind of is. But Somnolence Syndrome is also the exact reason for JD being almost completely unable to remember to do stuff.
I can call her from work at 1.59pm to ask if she is going in to town (as she said she planned to do) and she’ll say: I’m going after the 2pm news. Then, when I ring again at 3pm, she is still at home because she got side tracked and then forgot to go. In a single minute! I then have to stay on the phone as I tell her: if you still want to go in to town, get up now (I wait for her to get up) put your shoes on (I wait as she puts her shoes on), pack your bag (I wait as she packs her bag), take your phone and wallet and walk out the door (I wait until she has locked the door behind her). If I don’t do this, she can be distracted at any stage of the process and end up doing something different altogether.
In the past few weeks this kind of behaviour has led to me being really angry at times and feeling really bad about that anger. More out of frustration as I just can not understand how you can forget something in the space of a second. It has also made JD upset. We both failed to grasp the full impact of Somnolence Syndrome. We did some research on it last night and we were both quite shocked.
The principal symptoms were those of excessive drowsiness, feeling clumsy, an inability to concentrate, lethargy, being mentally slow and fatigue. The unexplained and overwhelming nature of the symptoms was a cause of anxiety. Somnolence syndrome is a collection of symptoms consisting of drowsiness, lethargy and fatigue. Forewarning patients and planning supportive management around times of drowsiness and fatigue can help to reduce the anxiety that these symptoms cause.
It explains a lot. I now feel more able to accept this behaviour. I feel more able to understand and deal with it. As long as JD does not mind me holding her hand, I will gladly guide her and help her keep her focus on simple stuff.